TO WIT: NEW HEIGHTS OF DELIRIUM

^THAT IS HOW I FEEL.

PLEASE END THE WAR. STOP THE BOMBINGS TO MY BRAIN, MY INTEGRITY, MY SELF-ESTEEM, MY FAITH IN HUMANITY, MY DESIRE TO LIVE. CEASE THE ATTACKS ON MY SANITY BEFORE I STRAP A BOMB TO MY SHOE AND GLEEFULLY STROLL THROUGH A CROWDED WAL-MART. TERRORIST JOKES NOT FUNNY YET? NEITHER ARE YOU SO S MY D, IT'S BEEN SEVEN YEARS SINCE 2001 AND IT'S BEEN SINCE SEVEN YEARS SINCE I STOPPED CARING ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED ON SEPTEMBER 11TH. I FAKE CRIED WHEN I WATCHED THE NEWS THAT DAY. MY PARENTS KNEW I WAS FAKING IT BUT THEY DIDN'T CALL MY BLUFF, PROBABLY BECAUSE THEY COULD RELATE. I WAS PRAYING FOR SCHOOL TO BE CANCELLED ON SEPTEMBER 12TH, OR BETTER YET FOR THE TERRORISTS TO ATTACK AGAIN AND MAYBE SCHOOL WOULD BE CANCELLED FOR THE REST OF THE MARKING PERIOD. THEY DIDN'T AND IT WASN'T. MAYBE AL-QAEDA AND OUR SUPERINTENDENT WERE AS AMBIVALENT AS I WAS. KNOCK KNOCK, WHO'S THERE? SEPTEMBER 11TH. SEPTEMBER 11TH WHO? I THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU'D NEVER FORGET. THINK POSITIVELY HERE PEOPLE, AT LEAST NOW WE HAVE A PERFECTLY LEGITIMATE EXCUSE TO KILL A SHITTON OF ARABS, MY PRESIDENT TOLD ME. MAYBE GEORGE W. BUSH WILL GIVE ME A PARDON IF I DON'T WRITE THIS PAPER ALTHO I DOUBT MY PROFESSOR WOULD ACCEPT ANYTHING FROM HIM AS LEGAL ACADEMIC TENDER BECAUSE IF SHE HAD A BLOGSPOT IT WOULD BE COMMUNISTCUNT.BLOGSPOT.COM, ALLITERATION BITCHES I LEARNED IT IN MY ENGLISH CLASS. THIS ASSIGNMENT IS THE SEPTEMBER 11TH OF THE AMERICA OF MY LIFE. SPEND MONEY, THAT'S ALL I WANNA DO RIGHT NOW. AND IN THIS ECONOMY THAT IS FAR MORE PATRIOTIC THAN LISTENING TO BONO, AN IRISHMAN, JERK HIMSELF OFF ON A 9/11 TRIBUTE ALBUM.

THE MUTUAL EXCLUSIVITY OF BEING THIN AND EATING LOTS OF PIZZA IS PROOF ALONE THAT GOD DOES NOT EXIST.